Mom-in-progress Kagiso Msimango had to hold a tribunal of sorts to keep her Things pap-free. She knows her grandmother had the best intentions, but pap alone will not do!
Almost every single member of my family has a food allergy or intolerance.
This exasperates Koko, my grandmother, who regularly exclaims: “When we were growing up people got sick from not eating, not from eating!”
This is the woman who raised me, and one thing we were never short of was food. Every morning before school, we would have soft porridge with butter, milk and sugar for breakfast.
I used to get severe headaches from this meal, and told her so. She dismissed my complaints, and my request for an alternative fell on deaf ears. Alas, skipping breakfast was not an option either. She would actually hover over me as had this meal, Kryptonite for one who is both lactose and gluten intolerant like me.
As soon as I went to boarding school and I was free to avoid milk and pap and I lost an incredible amount of weight. It turns out I was not actually a chubby child, like everyone assumed, I was bloated!
When I discovered that one of the things that predispose people to food allergies is a premature introduction to solids, I resolved not to introduce my children to solids until they were 6 months old. Thing 1 cried incessantly for the first . . . Oh, Thing 1 cries incessantly. When she was still an infant, Koko was convinced the crying was a sure fire sign that she was starving, despite the fact that she looked like she was preparing for the role of the Michelin man.
The pressure to feed my Thing was immense.
At some point, I could see my mother’s resolve waning. I was left to face off with my grandmother a typical steel fist in a velvet glove matriarch on my own. Koko had participated in the rearing of six children, numerous grandchildren and even two great-grandchildren before I had my Thing. All I had in my corner was Google and my firm knowledge that her child-rearing blind spot is her tendency to cure many childhood ills through feeding.
Exhibit 1:
My aunt had twins two months too early. Twins are generally smaller than singlets and being premature, these babies were tiny! They had to get admitted at three weeks for severe constipation because my grandmother gave them soft porridge to help them grow strong. I haven’t been three weeks old for 37 years but even I have to clear my diary in order to digest pap!
Exhibit 2:
When we were growing up, to fend off winter colds and and the flu, Koko would feed us cod liver oil, molasses and a spoonful of Vicks VapoRub. If there was no Vicks, she wouldn’t let that stop her from giving us our daily dose of petroleum based topical ointments. She’d just feed us Vaseline instead. If I’d grown up in America instead of Ga-Rankuwa I could probably sue her and Vicks for millions.
And now?
Thing 2 is now almost 7 months old and finally on solids. Her nanny confessed to my mother that she fears that the child is underfed because I only give her fruit and veggies. This is despite the fact that her double chin has its own double chin. A child can’t thrive without porridge, nanny complained to my mother, who stood at a safe distance when she delivered this news with a chuckle…
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