We all know that having a child changes your life forever, but some changes are so subtle – almost invisible – that I didn’t even notice they were happening – like dealing with the fugue state of sleep deprivation. So here are my top five (plus one.)
1. I drive slowly (all the time)
Seriously, I have grannies telling me to speed up. Quite soon after the my first kid arrived I saw a massive, gruesome accident on the N2, flanked by ambulances and fire engines and I thought ‘what if that was me?’ For the first time the reality of what that would mean hit me. Now I drive half the speed I used to.
2. I happily go to the gym
When I looked at my sleeping baby I used to think how much I wanted to be there for her. I realised how important it was to keep looking after myself and I started running and gyming to stay in shape. And I don’t want to turn up to sports day and have everyone ask: ‘Who’s the old guy in the wheelchair?’
3. I can sleep anywhere, anytime, through anything
After more than three years of interrupted sleep I can now fall asleep anywhere. I can probably sleep through an earthquake, but still manage to wake instantly the minute one of my kids stirs.
4. I seem to have lost my single friends
It wasn’t a choice really and it didn’t happen all at once but one day, a few years in, I realised that all the crazy drinking buddies I had weren’t there anymore. No more going out till 4am, throwing-up on my friend’s carpet and forgetting where I’d parked the car. It was quite an improvement actually. And anyway..
5. I got a bunch of friends with babies
Again, it wasn’t a choice. It just happened. I found myself gravitating towards other dads, calmed by their desperate expressions, which reflected mine as we discussed the challenges of keeping our children in their own beds and out of ours for the entire night. It’s good to not feel alone.
6. I willingly drink less
Getting drunk anywhere near a baby is dangerous, particularly if she can crawl better than you can. A few drinks are fine but it’s best not to get messy.
Did you experience some unintended consequences after your kids were born? Were they similar or different to mine? Let’s compare notes in the comments section.
Leave a Reply