“Sibaliscious!” For millions of TV viewers in more than 130 countries on five continents, that’s a rallying cry that turns good viewing into good cooking, as their convivial host puts her famous equation into action.
Food = Love, believes Siba Mtongana, and the proof is in the starters and mains as well as in the puddings. Siba, South Africa’s most celebrated celebrity chef, star of Siba’s Table on DStv’s Food Network channel, grew up in Mdantsane in East London.
Her mother, a retired teacher, kept a vegetable garden and encouraged her children to eat healthy meals and help out in the kitchen. Siba proved to have a natural talent for preparing simple, hearty African cuisine, a craft she honed by studying Food and Consumer Sciences and working as a food editor for Drum magazine.
Combining her cooking skills with a warm and zesty on-camera personality, Siba is proof that chefs are the new rock stars. She sat down with Ruda for a chat about food, family, the good life, and loving change.
Transcript:
R: Hello, and once again a very warm welcome to the Change Exchange, where today my guest is Siba Mtongana. Siba, we’re so glad to have you here, but I want you to introduce yourself, because I think many of our audience may be as clueless as I was … Your show, “Siba’s Table”, goes out to?
S: 130 countries, and believe it or not, in the States it airs on The Cooking Channel and it’s sixth at over 60 million homes. It’s insane.
R: And you were saying that when you get to Russia …
S: Yes, they ordered me a bodyguard.
R: Why? Because they mobbed you?
S: Not really because they mob, but because the show is really big there in Russia and Poland. It’s been one of the biggest shows in the country … That they thought I needed proper protection, which was fun. It was great. But it also airs in Africa, in the Middle East, in Europe, in Asia and in Australia.
R: You started cooking as a little girl in a very big family …
S: Yes.
R: How did that happen?
S: You know, cooking was such a natural thing for me. In fact, almost in every black household, kids from a very young age – boys and girls – are taught how to cook, how to clean, how to take care of their environment, how to do gardening and all of that. And I think I fell more in love with cooking, and my mother had a beautiful garden in our backyard and I remember … I have such great memories of when I was young, going to my mom’s garden, picking fresh herbs and getting spinach and getting vegetables … It was really, really lovely. So my mother was the first person who taught me how to cook.
R: When did you think this could be a career?
S: Never, ever, until I was in my matric. Now this was … There was a whole lot of drama that happened around me choosing food as a career. My mom was a teacher all her career – she was a teacher, and one of the things she’s always advocated us having proper careers and studying and going to university or varsity and all of that, so when I came to her and I said that I want to do food as a career … First, she didn’t get that … How can you do food as a career? It just didn’t exist … That was about more than 10 years ago, and it was before food became what it is now. And she said … I will never forget this … She said: “I have worked all my life to get you girls out of the kitchen, now you want to go back in the kitchen?”
S: So I was like, “Mama please, give me a chance.” There are courses out there which I could do.” In fact, one of the reasons why I chose to do food and consumer sciences – and I majored in food science and nutrition … It was her influence, because she was adamant that no child of mine is not going to go without formal education.
R: So you actually did a degree?
S: Yes.
R: Would you advise that for younger people?
S: I would definitely do, because it gives you such a great foundation. I feel like I did not have to work a lot more than the usual, because I had such a strong foundation. And I think for me that really gave such confidence when I was at university – I was an assistant tutor – a tutor, sorry. And then that created an opportunity for me to become an assistant lecturer, and from there I became a food editor for Drum Magazine. Without that background, without the exposure for those four years at varsity, I wouldn’t have had the skills and the knowledge to get into the job and do it easily. I still needed to be guided, of course, because it was far more different than what I did at university. At varsity we got all the background, we got all the things. But I think I was also quite lucky because being an assistant lecturer gave me an opportunity to teach other students and while I was teaching, that kind of to a certain degree gave me confidence to be able to make sure that when I do shoots for Drum magazine, it was a whole lot easier. So definitely.
R: So university gives you much more than just the subject knowledge. It’s a kind of … A development? A time for you to try other things, to develop as a person?
S: I think so. I would definitely agree with that statement, because I find that should I not have gone to university, that I would not have been as fast-tracked as … I think I would have struggled a whole lot more than if I didn’t, because it was such a great development stage, being at varsity at the time. So I think it’s necessary …
R: If you can do it.
S: If you can do it, and this is the thing: When I did my course, people … They used to laugh at me, saying: “How can Siba come all the way from the Eastern Cape to Cape Town and come and be taught how to cook an egg?” As if that’s all that there is to it! But there’s so much more to it, as you might know. There’s so much more – there’s food, there’s nutrition … Baking in itself is a complete science. So ja. I love it!
R: That’s very obvious! Tell me about your first job. Can you remember when you got the job at Drum?
S: I remember very vividly. I had gone to about three interviews, and they were very hectic. And with a panel of judges and they were very … It was quite intimidating …
R: Yes, because you were young!
S: I was very young back then. Fresh from varsity, and I remember one of the things that … I was … I came to be one of two who made it right till the end, and what they asked me to do was to do a … They gave us a practical to conduct a shoot, which was what I used to teach my students – how to do Media Studies and many other stuff. It came so naturally and it was so easy and I remember one of the editors came to me and said: “You’re so calm. Is that how you act under pressure?” And I’m like: “No, that’s not how I act under pressure. It’s just that I’ve been doing this for such a long time, that it’s now very natural for me.” So that was a great tick for me, and I think to a certain degree what gave me the opportunity to have the job. Yes!
R: And then they sponsored a cooking show?
S: Yes.
R: Is that how you, “Cooking with Siba”, started?
S: Came about. I had … At Drum … I think I was young and I wanted really for people to appreciate the work that I was doing – especially at the time. I was part of a lifestyle team. It was food, but first … This was the order: It was beauty, it was fashion, it was food and then it was decor. And I felt like … I was like number three in the log and I needed to make a change and I wanted to cook. So I went to my editors and I told them that, “Listen, let us, can I please cook with local celebrities? Because it will attract more people into my pages.” Because I felt like it was a lot of work to do, for people to just flip through as if it is just nothing. It was a weekly magazine, and weeklies are hectic! And just needed more people to come and spend time with my section. And so I cooked with local celebrities and it started to get traction, which was great. And then I’d give it a twist, whether it would healthy or whether it would be fast, whatever it was that I thought was correct at the time. And you know what? It was there where Cooking with Siba was born, because it grew so much that the lifestyle literally changed. Food became number 1, so people bought the magazine for the cover, and then food. And they thought we need to do something. So they got me into television. Now this was the time where E-Magazines – there was a big scare about everything going digital. Magazines are dying, we need to go … Whether on to Tele, or use other platforms like digital. So I was among the first who they put onto television, but I had absolutely no experience whatsoever. So even then I was like … I remember when I spoke to my former editor, Elmari Rautenbach, she said: “Siba, we’re going to put you on TV, my girl. You’re going to be amazing.” So I excitedly said YES! I was so excited, but then I went home and I was like: What did I just do? It’s almost December, it’s double deadlines, I was getting married at that time and I’m like I’m not going to have time to go for TV lessons or whatever I need. I just felt like literally, so small at that time and I went back to her and I said: “Elmari, I don’t think I can do this.” Literally at this point, while sobbing. Literally crying, and that was one of the things that I had promised myself never to do in a professional space. But I think I was so overwhelmed, but she was such a great leader. She said to me: “Sibatjie, my girl. Look here, you are amazing and you are a hard worker and you can do this. What I’ll do is, I’ll give you an assistant for TV and I’ll give you an assistant for the show … for your magazine work, so that you don’t have to be so overwhelmed with the amount of work you have to do.” So literally, that’s how Cooking with Siba was born.
R: And the first day in the studio? What was it like?
S: It was very intimidating, because, like first, when you watch TV, you only see the presenter. You don’t see the camera, the people, the lights, the sound – the entire production.
R: So you had no clue?
S: I had no clue – I had never been in a studio before so I remember asking the producer … What are the other people doing here? So what they did, which was quite lovely of them, is they put almost like a curtain where I just had to be with the needed amount of people, so clients and everybody else who wasn’t really needed for the very first episode was taken out and that really eased me into it. And …
R: Did you have to present straight to camera? Did you have to talk to the camera? In your first episode?
S: Yes, in my first episode!
R: Child!
S: I know! It was like … It’s like there’s something about the camera – especially if it’s your first time. It almost is as if it sees right through you – like right in! But I just did it. I did it, and Cooking with Siba got an award in its first season, which was amazing. It got a SAFTA.
R: And then you were headhunted by the US Food Network? Is that right?
S: That’s right. So what happened was Food Network had been wanting to have a show in South Africa. They had Jenny Morris, and then they wanted somebody who could be a younger person who could perhaps compliment the union between Jenny and whoever the person that they wanted. And they told me that they were looking for a guy – a young guy. So they came to South Africa, literally went through foodies, chefs and everybody who is into food, and about 400 people they interviewed. And they couldn’t find the person that they wanted. It was like almost there, but hmmmm, you know? They had small reservations … Almost, almost, almost. With certain individuals. So they went back. Now, Drum magazine had sold my shows, Cooking with Siba, to the African Channel and to the Middle East at the time. I was airing in Africa, the Cooking Channel in the UK … The African Channel in the UK – pardon me – and in the Middle East. And they were flipping through channels and BOOM, here I was, cooking with local celebrities in Cooking with Siba. And they were like: “Did we see her?” And they were: “No, we didn’t see her.” So they called me and I was working so hard, I was in the Drum office, I remember at the time. Working really hard, because I believe in working hard. And they called me and Sue, with a very English voice, called and said: “Hi, is that Siba?” And it was quite late, because it was in the summer so they’re two hours behind. And then I said: “Yes, it’s me.” And they said: “We’re from Food Network. We are very excited and would love to have an interview with you. When are you available?” So, now these are the two things my parents taught me: You must never be too desperate. At the same time, you must be keen enough to know that you’re interested in something.
R: That’s a fine balance!
S: So it was like: “Can we come and see you? How’s your diary looking next week?” And I was like: “Okay, let me just check …” And I was like, going all crazy, and I’m like: “Ah, my diary looks good for next week. And then they flew in, we had an interview – it was very informal – and they said: “She’s the one.”
R: And how do you experience the celebrity status? The loss of anonymity? The fact that you can’t walk down the street without people recognising you or reaching out to you?
S: I think at first it was weird – it was weird because literally if I go to do my shopping, people will take pictures and as much as I’m bubbly, I’m actually … Quite closed, funny enough.
R: Like, this is my space?
S: Not this is my space, but kind of shy-ish? And then, after some time I got used to it, and I think you kind of like get into it and it just becomes part of life. I have a trick, though. I have a trick, and my trick is I do shopping early in the mornings, which is like when they open at nine o’clock or seven o’clock or at eight o’clock. At the time I’m there, because there isn’t so many people, and then I usually go in quite late at night when there isn’t much. But I must say, though, that it’s so beautiful to be so well-received in my own country. Literally, everywhere I go, whether it be Cape Town or Jo’burg, even at home in East London or Durban, people always recognise me and they always take selfies … It’s really lovely, because it means that people have embraced you and you’re doing good things, I think.
R: And personally? You married your husband, Brian – he’s a graphic designer? You married him in 2010. How did you meet and how did you know he was the one?
S: Ah! It’s a very funny story. So I met him when I was 17 and I had come to visit my sister, who was in Cape Town at the time. And my mother had been saying: “Siba, you must come and study in Cape Town – not Jo’burg.” I wanted to go to Jo’burg. And then she kept on saying: “Come to Cape Town.” Then fine, she organised for me to come and have a holiday here with my sister. And I met him in the same complex, and the story is, my sister says, she had been trying to get him in their local church by inviting him all the time, and he’d go, he’d be like: “Maybe next week.” Or: “Oh, so sorry. Have friends coming over.” There was always some reason. So he saw me pass by and he literally ran to my sister and asked her: “Which church do you go to again?” So we met at church, we were very good friends – we dated for quite a long time because I was very young. I had just turned 18, in fact, when we started dating.
R: How much older is he?
S: He’s five years older. Yes. But I’ve always felt like I’m very mature for my age, so I need a guy who is older. So five years was good, I think.
R: When did you decide that he was the one?
S: That he was the one? I think that Brian is … Like he ticked all the boxes. He ticked all the boxes that I would require in a man. And I love the fact that he’s a modern man – he’s not like your stereotypical … Maybe I mustn’t say it …
R: The patriarch? And keep you in your place?
S: Ja. Yes. He gets me. He understands me, he pushes me, he’s not intimidated by my career, which is great, because he’s secure in who he is and I knew that when I met him, I said: “I want to be great. And whatever it is I’m going to do, I have a feeling that I’m going to be amazing at it and I need a person who’s going to understand that and who is not going to be intimidated by it.” And then he said: “Whoah! Excuse me!” But it was important for me, for him, for me to know if whether would he be a support structure or would he be somebody who will block me into doing things, because I’ve always wanted to be amazing and … Because I always pursue excellence in whatever it is that I’m doing. So even back then, even before we got married, he was very supportive in all of that. And I think inwardly I knew that we could have a great life together. Yes.
R: And has he turned out like that? Because many men would say: “Yes, of course. Yes, dear.” But then when it happens they might not quite experience it like that.
S: To be honest, I’m one of the lucky girls out there. Because he’s that and more. Brian is absolutely amazing in my career, when I’ve got times where I feel intimidated, he’ll tell me that: “Sibs, come on! You can do this.” He really supports me, and it’s the same with him. I’d do the same for him in his career, so we are very … The thing is, we’re very good friends. Like, we do everything together. And it’s the same with our kids – we take our kids everywhere. We do business sometimes, if time allows, that’s the kind of family we are.
R: You’ve had three little ones in the same period that your career has been taking off like this. How did you manage all of this at the same time? You’re the original Superwoman!
S: [Laughs] Where is the sign? Sometimes I think: How crazy am I? When things get too hectic, I’m, like: “Gosh, can one really be Superwoman?” But I think that’s what it is – having a family and having a career. There are moments where you feel like things are just too hectic. And I think what I have … What I have done to help me in the process is to make sure that I’ve got proper support structures in place. For instance, in my business, I’ve got a fulltime assistant, I’ve got an agent who does my diary and my booking and all of that. We’ve got a brand manager who does that part of the job, so I don’t have to be hands-on on everything. I just need to oversee what everything has been done. And then, at home, I’ve got a full time nanny – and she is absolutely amazing – and then I do get somebody to come help us from time to time with cleaning and things like that to make sure that things don’t become too hectic for her, as well. And I worked from home for a very long time, but now I’ve secured offices and I’m moving out, so I think you make do. I want it all – that’s my thing! I want to have kids and I wanted to have kids younger so that I can grow up with them and as I grow in my career, they grow. It’s like – I’ve had one now. Okay, let’s have all of them so that the baby-making stage can be over and they can all grow at the same time.
R: Do you think they have changed you? Becoming a mother has changed you?
S: Most definitely. Like, I think before … I’m not a vain person, naturally. Because I think the environment that I grew up in never … What’s the word? Never…
R: Never made that possible?
S: Never made that possible, really.
R: You were the youngest of six ..
S: Six kids.
R: Six children and then two …
S: Adopted, yes. So sharing, literally. When Bunny says: “Sharing is caring!” That was my mother. So we grew up knowing that you need to share and you need to be considerate of other people and you need to … Life is beyond yourself.
R: You’re part of a bigger unit.
S: A bigger unit. So from a very young age we were taught that, so at some point I remember when I had started working, I would buy myself this and that and that, which is really lovely, which I still do from time to time, but when you start having kids, the shift literally is like 360. Everything is about them. When I see beautiful clothes, I think of them. When I see a shoe for myself, I have to think do I really need it. Do I, do I? But for them, literally, I just grab it even without thinking. I think the beauty of having children is that … I’m Christian … Born in a Christian family. It’s that I see how much God loves us, because even in a state where I won’t feel loveable – I would call it that – I see it in my kids when my older one, my four year old, is in a stage where he’s naughty. He’ll say to me … I’m like: “No, no. You can’t talk like that.” I discipline him. And then he says: “I’m not talking. I’m speaking!” Parenting 101! Where are the books! How do I respond to that? Which is really lovely. And even when he’s naughty and even when he’s been naughty and not behaving, I still love him. There’s nothing he could ever do that could ever take away the love I have for him. And I think that has really strengthened my relationship with God, because I now understand that there’s nothing that I could ever do that could make Him love me less. I love it!
R: What do you want to teach them? What’s the one thing you want to give them as a parent? Apart from external stuff?
S: External stuff … I think humility. Because that’s the environment I grew up with, and I think it’s different in the age that, within the age that we grow up now. Like, for instance, when I was young, I knew the entire neighbourhood and I could go next door and it was like nothing. I want them to have a certain … To learn that life, just like I learned, is not just about me. There’s a bigger picture out there and to be considerate of other people. I want them to know that although they are growing in a much better family compared to the family … Financially I would say compared to the family I grew up with, they still need to appreciate things and not have an element of self-entitlement. I want them to … I don’t want the material things to be such a focus. I want them to know God, I want them to be anchored in proper, proper things. And be well-disciplined. But at the same time I don’t want to be too much of a disciplinarian to a point where it crushes them.
R: It’s such a fine balance. All the time! And your home? What do you want in a home? You said you should soon-ish move into a bigger place because the kids are now growing up and they need more space? What are you looking for?
S: I think in a home … For me, the foundation of a home should be love. I want my children to know that they’re loved and even if they have done wrong, they can always come to mom and dad and be able to tell us without fearing. And I believe because I was loved, I was able to be confident enough to take on certain things that maybe I wouldn’t have been able to. I want them to grow up knowing that literally the world can be their oyster, and as long as they work hard, their parents … We work very hard … And I always advocate working hard and just not expecting … For people not to expect things to be done for them, but taking the initiative and doing things and much rather be the person who brings the change, who gives, who does this instead of receiving all the time. I want them to be like that. Yes.
R: Siba, I think your children are so lucky to have you as a mother.
S: Thank you.
R: All the very, very best. And I’m sure we’re going to hear a lot about you.
S: Thank you so much! Thank you.
R: Go well. Until next time then. Goodbye.
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