A couple of months ago, my partner and I found ourselves beneath the solstice moon, its full light casting a silver path over the restless ocean.
As the waves crashed with wild intent, offering a soothing, rhythmic forgiveness, we sat on the beach and meditated on the brilliance before us.
We chose this magical moment to redefine the intent of our relationship.
A week prior, we had discovered the concept of “radical acceptance”. It felt like the perfect foundation upon which to build our renewed intentions. It resonated deeply with us, offering a profound sense of grounding and hope.
Recently, I stumbled on a cherished memory from the beginning of our journey together, 12 years ago.
We had embarked on a lover’s holiday (long before the term “baecation” became popular) to the enchanting Wild Coast.
The effortless nature of our love during that time remains vivid. We were attuned to each other’s needs, often without words, responding with an innate understanding of each other’s love languages.
It was after this idyllic getaway that he proposed, and I joyfully said yes. Choosing our wedding venue was easy. The Wild Coast had captured our hearts. We knew we wanted to exchange our vows by the ocean, where our love had felt so free and effortless.
Over the years of marriage, we built a home together. For him, that also meant building a business empire.
As his business demands grew, he poured more of himself into it, while I struggled to keep the home fires burning on my own.
To maintain my sanity and sense of self, I delved into passions that ignited my spirit. I immersed myself in gardening, a source of peace and joy.
As we pursued our separate paths, our conversations became disjointed. We often spoke past each other. When we did check on each other’s pulses, we reaffirmed our commitment to stay together through the tough times. But something was missing.
We realised that while we loved each other deeply, we needed a more conscious effort to connect and understand each other.
Our move to Durban, driven by a new business opportunity for him, marked a turning point.
After 10 years of drifting through our relationship, we experienced an “Aha moment”.
Under the gaze of the solstice moon, with the ocean as our witness, we renewed our vows to each other.
We pledged to understand one another more deeply, to be patient with our misconceptions, and to resolve these by asking questions.
We vowed to listen without prejudice and to practice radical acceptance of each other. We committed to having each other’s backs.
The moon that night was so lit, that we decided to make it a ritual. Every full moon, we now walk to the beach, sit under the glow, and have a wholesome, pulse-checking conversation.
I eagerly await the harvest of these intents we’re sowing, as we continue to grow and evolve, hand in hand, under the ever-watchful moon.
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