With the holidays now just a hazy memory, it’s time to get back into daily grind of the schoolday routine. Here are some hacks to make it a little easier, for parent and scholar alike
We’re about to enter year five of formal schooling (Grade 4), and one thing we now know for sure is that after five to seven weeks of lazy, hazy summer days, nobody’s got time for the mundanity of routine, uniform, extramural scheduling and school lunches.
But when it comes to who hates back to school more, we need to refer to the TV ref to see if it should go to the kid or the budget.
It took us two years to realise we’re not comfortable with the stress of seeing the school fees bill every month, so we made the really, really mature decision (for us anyway) of sinking my 13th cheque and any other extra money into the school fees account before February for a) the 5% discount schools offer if you settle the annual fees by then and b) to avoid the month-end insomnia of having to pay the school fees instalment.
And yes, it is as painful as it sounds. No lavish festive season, just necessities and a few treats here and there. But the reward after a painful December is the sweet relief of not having to try to massage the monthly budget and fret about the kid being kicked out of school for failure to pay.
If you have kids at school, you’re probably nodding your head vigorously, unless you’re rolling in money. Because besides the pesky school fees, you have music fees, art fees, sports club, drama, etc.
I remember having a we’re-free-of-nappies party when the kid was potty-trained. How delusional we were, thinking that no longer having to fork out thousands on nappies would mean we could travel the world! Those thousands soon found a nice extramural-sized hole to fill.
My husband is a stay-at-home dad due to health reasons, so we at least don’t have the aftercare/au pair expense to worry about. And after 10 years of this gig, we know that I best steer clear of homework (lost tempers, sense of humour failures and stony silences); extramural scheduling (missed lessons, wrong venues) and play dates (double bookings, awkward social interactions) for the sake of everyone’s mental health.
So even though husband no longer being able to work is not great, we at least have the best parent – organised, everybody loves him – for the job. Prime Parental’s got this. On the days when he’s out of action, we flounder spectacularly and all the balls are dropped.
One thing our five years of schooling has taught us, is to keep it simple. After school fees, the next biggest headache has to be uniforms. Luckily for us, our school does the shorts-and-golfer combo and barefoot in summer, white sneakers when we need to look tidy. Easy peasy.
We buy five golfers, one for every day, and two shorts. In winter we switch to lined track pants and fleece top over the golfer. If you’re at the more formal schools and stuck with old school uniform, I’m sure you know all about the advances in school uniforms.
Unlike our parents, we have stain resistant uniforms that are easy to wash and need almost no ironing. Hurrah. Remember having to polish your school shoes until your dad/the headmaster could see their face in your shoes?
School shoes nowadays come with an anti-scuff, no-need-to-polish-finish that’s easy to clean as well. And just as you think you’ve survived the school prep, you check the kid’s bag and lunchbox. You need to fill a lunchbox, five days a week, four weeks a month, 10 months of the year.
You have to navigate the worst food critic and the pickiest eater you ever have come across. You have to keep the teacher happy too, as lunchboxes are inspected these days. Wonder what these teachers would have made of the soggy Marmite, peanut butter, jam, and cheese sandwiches we had when we were kids?
Lunchboxes now have to subscribe to the robot eating plan: reds, greens and yellows. How dare these teachers? Never mind, this is where this parent finally gets to shine. I like shopping, with a glass of wine in one hand and a mouse in the other.
I work my way through the list of reds, greens, yellows and all the other colours Prime Parental instructs me to buy. I add to cart and he gets his delivery the next day. The lunchbox is filled and the kid is ready to slay 2018.
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