There are worse things, I suppose, than being called a “Stay at home Dad”. How about the perfectly ghastly “Mr. Mom“? Or “House-husband“? I prefer the term “Executive Dad” (ED). It makes more sense and it sounds better.
As ED I spend most of my time out and about. I work from home, I do the shopping, I taxi (yes, you know what I mean) the children to-and-from school, I take them for haircuts, buy takkies for those scary, fast growing teen toes, I work in tandem with our domestic helper, I pay bills, take care of the menagerie (dogs, cockatiel), and so on.
I am a freelance writer so I do not have a set income. This means my wife is the primary earner. Telling someone I’m a secondary earner is not easy. People react as if I admitted having a shady social disease. This is usually followed by “oh, so you are a stay-at-home-dad”, to which I reply “Ag, it’s a long story,” and I change the subject. Life’s too short.
When I lost my job three years ago and started working from home, it became clear that I would become the CEO, project manager, financial director, buyer and chauffeur of the Nadler-Nir household with its four shareholders – my wife, son and daughter.
An ED has his fingers on the purse, that’s my job. Well, ne of my jobs. Online ordering and purchasing, loyalty cards and peer-to-peer exchange of knowledge (mostly via Social networks) are my tools of choice. They save me time and money, especially money.
I learned the hard way that Monday’s vegetables are rubbish because they are leftovers from the weekend, that I can save a packet by checking the ‘Price per Kg’ (or Litre), making sure that I am not simply getting less bang for my buck and that ‘free’ (price, but also sugar and fat) never is.
These are the ED 5 rules of thumbs. They work for us. They might work for you too:
(1) Household and family needs come first.
(2) Healthy, legal, decent and non-fattening cheap popular-measures are cool.
(3) When in doubt opt for the cheaper/faster/least disruptive solution, unless it is in contradiction with any other rule.
(4) If still in doubt, call for a shareholders’ meeting.
(5) A household is a benevolent dictatorship, parents have majority shares and can veto certain decisions.
I enjoy being ED. It is not easy, but it has its fun moments. For one – My freedom means that I don’t get the Monday morning blues any more!
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