You may think you’re still young when you’re on the other side of 25, until you get big white envelope that reminds you you’re a pensioner-in-training. So how do you cope? Here are some valuable lessons from a veteran of the plus-25 generation.
There are two factors that are certain in life: death and taxes. It is because of the latter that I never look at my payslip. Taxes are the true heartbreakers in life. Even though death is certain, the exact time is unknown and what I have now to relish, is youth.
I think of myself as relatively young, relative to my grandmother who is 80 – she used to call my father, a man of 50, a young man, therefore I am a baby, or so I would like to think. The fact is that I am now over the age of 25, and as young as I would like to think I am, life has showed me otherwise.
Once a year, my workplace gives its employees a big white envelope with vast pages filled with characters of numbers, graphs, percentages and diagrams of one’s calculated savings for when they retire. I am a person who likes words more than numbers and so my eyes skimmed over all the pages.
I looked at the at the figures and suddenly understood our President’s contention. Numbers should be written in words. Anyway, the number that caught my eye the most was the date of my retirement. My heart panged as I realised how close it was – a few 30 odd years and I would be considered a pensioner.
The day I received the white envelope, everything seemed to come to a halt and I started to think about the realisations I came to after 25. I came to realise that I have been struggling at the gym. A few years back I lost weight much easier and faster than currently. After age 25 the body clings onto fat, as if there is an imminent food shortage.
The first year of work I had a few handouts from my father. Now, a few years after his passing, I’ve realised that I still struggle to manage my finances. But being the daughter who was raised right, I pay my insurance. Along with financial management comes time management. The first 18 years of our lives are time-managed by parents, and then after that you’re thrown into university and expected to master this task.
It is even more difficult now with social media begging us to be constantly online. Give your time to what matters. Ask yourself, why does this deserve my time? Will I be happy in the evening when I think of how spent my time in the day?
When you reach your mid-20s, comparisons abound. Friends may have apartments, cars, solid jobs and seem to never be broke. The best reaction in this event is to not compare yourself. You are on your journey and these assets may come much later in life. If you are persevering and working towards your goals you will achieve them in your own time. Comparison is a thief of joy.
Work, after sleep takes up most our time spent on this earth. If you are not in your passion, work to be in the stream of it. The work I’m in does not require creativity, which is distressing considering I am creative. I made it my goal to find creative projects which did not interfere with my work schedule and so even though my work is not in line with my passions, I have side jobs that are and for now they will suffice.
This brings me to another realisation. I need to work smart and not hard. Do the work that will elevate you to a level where you no longer have to work hard but work smart. When one is young the misconception is that there will always be time. It is not true. While mistakes are good for life lessons, they can consume a lot of time and energy. Working hard consumes both. Find a method of attacking a task in simplest way but will also achieve the goal.
The 20s are when you do the work to lay down a solid foundation for your 30s. It is because of this that we may find ourselves saying yes to every task, job, project. I had to learn to say no because I had reached burnout. Learn the power of no. Sometimes we say yes out of fear, fear that the next opportunity may not come. We say yes to openings that we know deep down inside are not meant for us.
I was recently offered a promotion at work and I declined in spite of a pay increase because it was not for my chosen path. Knowing yourself, knowing what is meant for your growth and life goals is fundamental to living a successful life.
Inhale. Remember to breathe. It is an automatic function but taxes have made it that much harder. Close that receipt, that payslip and breathe. All that matters is what cannot have a figure placed on it, like every breath you take.
The adults we are, are not that different from the children we were. We are taller, bigger with fancier clothes and some authority but our “inner child” has never left. I was a child who played alone. I had a few friends but for the most part was alone. This made me sensitive and insecure when I was within social circles.
My parents and family said it was a passing phase, but after the age of 25 I beg to differ, and it is not a bad thing. I know how to carry a conversation and I may not be as popular as my co-workers, but these are differences which must be celebrated. It is not high school and we do not need to fit in.
Life is a series of phases. Resisting change is futile and may be detrimental to psychological and emotional health. I have to say, for me, the phase where I became a taxpayer has been the most heart wrenching. In my mid-20s I realise that life is mostly uncomfortable and I should get used to that.
Every year that big white envelope reminds me of changes in graphs, charts and numbers. Someone is recording my life into statistical data. My duty is to live it the best way I know how, with vigour and unpredictable joy. That is the biggest realisation of all.
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