Oh no! Our House Looks Like it’s Been Remodelled by Miley Cyrus

MyBackYard_FEATIt starts with a simple plan to fix up and expand a few areas of your home. But as the builders get to work, it looks as if Miley has swung by on her wrecking ball. So here are a few tips to help you survive your next big home renovation.

The plan was simple and limited to the outbuilding. We were going to replace a few rotten wooden doors and windows with aluminium substitutes and install a kitchenette so we could rent it out as a proper cottage or guest accommodation on AirbnB.

Four weeks down the line it looks like Miley Cyrus swung through our property on her wrecking ball, spewing a trail of dust all over the ‘habitable’ parts of our house.

On our dining room table, a laptop with an open spreadsheet glaring at us through a dust-covered screen, the list of costs and suppliers mounting by the day.

Whenever we moan about “the project”, everyone seems to say “all builders are the same”. At first, I didn’t agree, but after a considerable amount of introspection, I think they’re right.

Heck, I’ll even add a bit more to this notion by suggesting that all renovation projects are the same, the opening of a hornet’s nest that you have very little control over if there isn’t meticulous planning involved (and it has to be very meticulous).

This is what we’ve learned so far:

– Never choose a contractor who charges by the day. In the beginning, we were convinced it was going to be a relatively minor job and a daily fee made more sense, but we were wrong. Selecting that other contractor with the proper quote would have been a wiser choice.

– Never underestimate the extent of a minor job. Halfway through the removal of the rotten window-and-door-frames, our contractor ‘discovered’ that the outbuilding didn’t have proper lintels. Solution? The insertion of new lintels required the removal of more frames and windows than we bargained for. The builders also needed to chop away pieces of wall and rebuild parts of these walls. And somewhere along the way, they had to extend a part of the roof and ceiling.

– Impulsive go-aheads will cost you. Dearly. We initially weren’t too spooked by the lintel-disaster and happily obliged when the contractor suggested further improvements. Like redoing the outbuilding’s plumbing inside the walls, as opposed to previously exposed plumbing, which was an eyesore. We also gave an impulsive thumbs-up when the contractor suggested they might just as well move a few plugs and light switches to more ‘intuitive’ positions. An electrician ended up rewiring the outbuilding and installing a new switchboard to do this. By this point, we managed to renegotiate the contractor’s daily fee.

– Never, ever say “we might just as well while we’re at it”. While the new lintels, plumbing and rewiring threw a fair share of spanners in the works, I thought we might as well make use of the opportunity of having the builders around by looking into options to free up more space on our somewhat cramped patio. We (I mean, the builders) ended up knocking down a curved, multi-levelled wall connecting the main house with the outbuilding. It  served no purpose, apart from housing our herb garden. We only realised the tiling on the patio needed to be redone once the wall was knocked down. So we had to go tile shopping this weekend.

– You have to draw the line somewhere. Looking at my bank balance, I think we’ll  have to draw the line at the tiles. But with another two weeks to go before the final deadline we gave the contractor, our minor-major project is far from complete. So never say never.