The Day My Daughter Turned Into Darth Vader

DarthVader_PostedA long time ago, in a galaxy far away … well, all right, a little while ago, in a spare bedroom close by, a little girl who loves Star Wars embarked on a space invasion. This is what happened next.

I’ve just been the victim of a successful land grab – in my own home! Here’s what went down:

My middle and youngest daughters have been sharing a bedroom for the past couple of years. Their cohabitation has always been an uneasy affair, but it has devolved into all-out sibling war in recent months. Aged 11, our middle child is a self-described “geek” and a bit of a night owl.

She is happiest when left in peace to read, listen to music or re-enact scenes from Star Wars. At 7, our youngest wants someone to plait her dolls’ hair and give her lots (and lots, and lots) of attention. She’s an early bird and not all that keen on taking the role of Luke Skywalker to her sister’s Darth Vader.

They’ve both been angling for their own rooms for a while now, but their pleas have fallen on deaf – as in purposefully plugged – ears. My husband and I haven’t wanted to give up our spare bedroom/general storage space and just didn’t feel up to the schlep of moving all that stuff around.

So young Vader took matters into her own hands and simply moved into the spare bedroom a few weeks ago. First, it was just her. We’d put her to bed in her own room and find her in the spare bedroom the next morning. Next came a pile of books, then some toys and soon the spare room floor was strewn with her possessions.

This was unavoidable, she pointed out, as there was no cupboard space available for her to stash her stuff. She withstood all attempts at relocation. We knew we had a serious squatting problem when she posted a glitter-glue adorned sign on the door with the words: “Artist at work. Donut enter!!!” (This in reference to her dabbling in the dramatic arts. She plans to win an Oscar one day. Not sure about the donuts though – perhaps she sees herself in law enforcement someday too).

I considered eviction, litigation even! And readied my light sabre for battle with the Supreme Commander of the Imperial Forces.

But then I realised something.

There were fewer fights and both girls were sleeping better. And so were we.

So over the weekend I took Miss Vader shopping for new bed linen, curtains, a bookshelf and a desk. She surprised me by turning down the Star Wars duvet cover I proffered for a pretty floral option, neatly arranged her books in the shelves and stacked her clothes and toys in the now-emptied cupboards. (Shout out to my hardworking hubby who did all the lifting and moving!).

For 24 hours, peace descended on our home.

Mainly because my eldest and youngest were giving us the silent treatment; both feeling a little sulky and jealous of their sister’s new digs. (I exaggerate, of course – they were a little envious but also very kind and gracious towards their sister).

The ex-spare bedroom was impeccably tidy and guests were invited on a room tour conducted by a very thorough tour guide: “This is my bookshelf. These are my books. This is Cindy, my teddy bear and little Darthie, my Star Wars soft toy …”

But by Monday, normality was restored. Books and clothes were strewn across the floor of the not-so-new new bedroom, regardless of all the newly acquired storage space. And cross-passage skirmishes have resumed between the Dark Side and our reluctant little Jedi mistress.

My daughter often tells me of the many improvements she’ll make to the world when she’s “Overlord of the Universe.”

I think she’s serious.