Heard of ‘bride drop’? It’s that after-the-party downer that comes when the honeymoon is over and real life begins. Kirsty Bisset tells you how to survive the days after the ‘big day’
“Morning, husband”
“Hey, wife!”
“What shall we do today?”
*crickets*
Women the world over are feeling the effects of “Bride Drop”, that sensation that hits you like a badly-thrown bouquet after your wedding. So, it’s all over. No more planning. No more people fawning over your every move. No more champers at 10am for no apparent reason.
Should we be surprised? Your wedding day is a culmination of months or maybe even decades of planning. You’ll experience nothing short of utter joy and elation on the best day of your life, followed by…what, exactly? Marriage? Is that it?
Many brides are left with a post-wedding hangover. Not the usual Patron-induced one, mind you. It’s one that leaves them feeling lost and empty. To be honest, I was kinda one of those brides.
I woke up on the Sunday after my wedding and was heart-broken that it was over. I couldn’t understand why it didn’t carry on. Why couldn’t there have been more than 24 hours in that day?
Now that it’s all over, what are you going to do with all of the energy, creativity and excitement that you had for the past year? What are you going to do with all of that extra time? How are you going to survive without having the entire world revolve around you?
Well, take it from me, the best is yet to come, but here are a few tips to help ease the equivalent of post-nuptial PMS.
1. Give yourselves something to look forward to. If your life together isn’t enough, then don’t go on honeymoon right away. Plan a romantic getaway for your one-year anniversary.
2. Adjust your expectations. If you’ve been dreaming of this perfect day since you were five, wake up from that nuptial slumber. A wedding is conduit to marriage – something that takes far more than a year of DIY and Pinterest boards to perfect.
3. Go back to that day. Relive it. It will spark that excitement you now crave. Look at photos, watch your wedding video, or go back to your venue to reminisce.
4. Look beyond the altar. As fun as it is to take a stroll down memory aisle, your life awaits you. A life you have chosen to share with someone who rocks your world. Rock it!
Planning a wedding is incredibly time-consuming. But life still goes on. If you can find enough hours in the day to handle your work, family and personal commitments while planning your wedding, think what you can achieve once those wedding bells have tolled. You now have all those extra hours, so use them.
Devote the passion and attention-to-detail that you put into wedding planning to something you’ve been putting off. Starting your own business, redecorating the spare room, spending more time with loved ones, or practising a sport.
Imagine what you could achieve if you invested as much time and passion into perfecting something as you did your wedding day.
When the lights come on and the DJ plays that last song, nothing is different, and that is a wonderful thing. Your wedding is not the end-goal. Nor is it some magical light switch that will turn marriage on the following day.
In the greater scheme of things, your wedding day shouldn’t hold a candle to what marriage has in store. You are so much more than a wife. You are a friend, lover, and confidant. There is no need for labels if the love of your life views you the way they did on your big day.
Welcome to the rest of your life. Now go and live it.
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